Oprah Winfrey-endorsed life coach Iyanla Vanzant offers us a rare and revealing view into Ruff Ryder DMX’s troubled life.

It’s almost too easy to poke fun at maligned rapper DMX, and after last year’s viral videos the height of his addiction was suddenly very visible – this latest video only adds to the myth. On an episode of the OWN Network’s Iyanla: Fix My Life, the rapper explains in depth his problems with drugs, women and family over the course of a very difficult hour. It’s not easy viewing, but if anything can be gleaned from the hour it’s that DMX’s trouble is nothing to be laughed at (something FACT has been guilty of in the past, granted); while incredibly exploitative, the show paints a portrait of a damaged man, and doesn’t really offer a resolution or, as the show puts it, a ‘fix’.

DMX offered an addendum speaking to JET Magazine but rather than show the typical “I’m cured” or pass the show off as misinformation, he simply fuels the fire with more bizarre, incoherent behavior. Take a look at both below.