Skream – ‘Bang That’

Joe Muggs: It’s absolutely rock solid, and it sounds like Skream. Exactly what he should be doing. But he should be rolling out six of these a month, not making us wait years for it. If he did that, he might make a next-generation ‘Doom’s Night’, which this threatens to be, but isn’t quite. (7)

Kristan Caryl: Jones must be able to bang plastic, staid shit like this out in less than five minutes nowadays. I don’t know why he bothers. (2)

Chal Ravens: And why not? Clean, simple and absolutely fizzing off the combustive energy of the ‘roid rage bass growl against the ladylike synth stabs. Bit weird to see Skream on Boysnoize, but actually this track quite tastefully mines the small overlap between their sensibilities. (7)

John Twells: It’s all very well to sit down in the middle of the day listening to this, nodding along, but I challenge anyone not to react with an excited squeal to ‘Bang That’ at around midnight smack in the middle of a set. Massive. (7)

5.8

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Wu-Tang Clan – ‘Keep Watch’

Kristan Caryl: I find it hard to believe any hip hop or Wu Tang fan won’t love the soulful old school stylings of this: it augurs really well for the forthcoming LP.  (9)

John Twells: What was it that RZA said on the intro to Wu-Tang Forever about rap and bullshit? Does the world really need another Wu album? Was 8 Diagrams even worth listening to more than once? Hood up – jam ‘Ice Cream’ on repeat and forget this garbage. (4)

Chal Ravens: There’s nothing actively shitty about this but perhaps there should be a cap on the number of victory laps a heritage act is allowed to complete. (5)

Joe Muggs: Awww I don’t want to be all Grandpa Simpson, but they don’t make them like that any more. (10)

7

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Kylie Minogue – ‘Sexercise’ 

Chal Ravens: Newsflash, young ones: the over-40s have sex! Probably while listening to dubstep! Personally I’m more worried about those damp cotton leotards and the eyebrow that’s still threatening to hurl itself off Kylie’s static face. Anyway I’ve listened to this six times in a row now. (7)

John Twells: Only Kylie Minogue can engineer a track called ‘Sexercise’ to sound strangely mournful and melancholy. On the surface it might be a lurching, bass-heavy pop monster but strip back the glossy pink paint and there’s a bleary-eyed #sadgirl underneath. (7)

Joe Muggs: SO stupid, so preposterous, so funny, and the world needs more gay brostep. (7)

Kristan Caryl: Watch and learn, Miley, watch and learn. (7)

7

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Matrixxman, Pol Style and Vin Sol – ‘Power Top’

Joe Muggs: ‘Erotic Discourse’ with a bit of dirt under its fingernails, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Does the business. (8)

Kristan Caryl: I like how dynamic the various elements of this are. They wheel up high then arc back down low and you sort of crane your neck along with them in the process. Something’s missing, though – maybe that kick drum is just a little too polite and reticent to really make an impact. (7)

Chal Ravens: So there was a great tune hiding in the Crazy Frog song all along! A round of applause also for the outro which floats up and up into nothing, a bit like ascending to the pearly gates only to find Peter’s taken the afternoon off. (7)

John Twells: Rickety, ragged, analogue house music, but without the annoying “babby makes first dance track” shakes I hear so vividly in most self-proclaimed outsider house. It’s simple as hell, but there’s a fucking point to it, and an endearingly grotesque quality to the chiming comb-filter sounds and pinging percussion. Proper. (8)

7.5

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Skepta & JME – ‘That’s Not Me’

John Twells: What’s with grime taking a leaf out of the noise playbook and rinsing the VHS style? Hard to complain to be honest – the beat’s barely audible but fuck me, Skepta and JME throw down bars that’d make Cadbury’s want to pack it in. If there’s never a proper HQ version of this it’ll be even more perfect. (9)

Kristan Caryl: Skilful versing, but I’m pretty sure these two wouldn’t even want someone as white and middle class as me to be a fan of their stuff. Which is lucky. (4)

Joe Muggs: Is that a JME beat? I wish, wish, wish he’d do some more instrumental EPs. Track’s really good, from what I can hear of it…but are the lyrics an admission that Skepta’s pop-house type tracks were a mistake? I hope so. If anyone shouldn’t have been trying to get Dappy dollars it’s him. (7)

6.7

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Floating Points – ‘King Bromeliad’

John Twells: I like Floating Points, I really do, but there’s a point (ahhh) where the jazziness gets a bit much and I just have to look away. This one’s not for me I’m afraid – beautifully produced, as usual, but I can barely get through the whole nine minutes without having to douse myself in blue pop. (5)

Kristan Caryl: Three long years, Flo Po. THREE. LONG. YEARS. If you weren’t such a genius producer I would have forgotten about you by now. But you are and I haven’t and this is totally great: the swaying percussion, the nimble fingered keys, the sumptuous orchestration… oh mama, pass us a Kleenex.  (10)

Joe Muggs: Oh spring IS in the air isn’t it?  Lovely. (9)

8

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Final scores:
Floating Points – ‘King Bromeliad’ (8)
Matrixxman, Pol Style and Vin Sol – ‘Power Top’ (7.5)
Kylie Minogue – ‘Sexercise’ (7)
Wu-Tang Clan – ‘Keep Watch’ (7)
Skepta & JME – ‘That’s Not Me’ (6.7)
Skream – ‘Bang That’ (5.8)

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